NO ONE WANTS MY STUFF

Another Lifetime, Another Era

Do you have “cleansing frenzies”? Every once in a while, I’ll wake up with a madness to clean out and discard. I choose a closet or cabinet, some specific area, and just pick it clean.

My husband, Steve, is a hoarder of the highest degree. When Steve sees me making a pile, he knows what’s going on. He quietly mutters, “It’s my stuff too”. He has been known on occasion to perform Trash Can Recon, sneaking items and hiding them, unsuccessfully, in the garage.

Now, if you have grown children, let me ask: Have you tried offering them your good china? Crystal? The silver flatware that hasn’t seen the light of day since forever ago?

What about your Hummel collection? (Just kidding, unless you inherited it from your mother and you couldn’t say no.)

I could never say no to my mom. Today’s adult children, on the other hand? They have no such hang-ups. They say “no” fast, before you even finish the sentence: “Would you like my ivory, platinum ringed Lenn-“ “Nope.” “Oh, well, how about my crys-“ “No mom, stop!”

So, I’m wondering, what things of ours will our adult children want?

I recently entered a cleansing frenzy in my kitchen. It involved two of my larger cabinets. I unearthed a warming tray (wedding gift, 1975), a 30-cup coffee maker (from our partay! days), and a hideous “mug tree” thingy from which once dangled equally hideous tic-tac-toe mugs. These long-forgotten treasures, and much more, were loaded into the trunk of my car and driven straight to the Revivals donation center before Steve arrived home from work.

Even a cleansing frenzy involving my clothes closet is carefully scrutinized by my husband. If I so much as slide a hanger off the rod, Steve’s there snooping. “You’re giving that away? Are you sure you’ll never wear it again”? Well, honey, if I’m finally giving an item of clothing away, after years of “do I, or do I not”, then yes, I AM SURE.

But, I digress.

What should I do with my “good stuff”, all accouterments from another life and another era?

My girlfriends face the same quandary. They tell me to give it away to Revivals. Well, I will if you will, and you go first!

Years ago, my dad hosted a family dinner at his place. After dinner, he instructed me, my two brothers, and Joshua to walk around and decide what items we each wanted after he passed away. It was weird, but we did it, each paying attention to what the others chose, so we didn’t overlap. Joshua picked one item, a fabulous Jamaican print, which he still hangs today.

When dad did pass away, he instructed, in a letter he had written to us, we were to take the items we wanted, “And there will be no arguing”. I still laugh about that.

Since Joshua is an only child, he’ll have no one to argue with. I suppose sometime in the future, when the grands are older, I’ll host a family dinner. After dinner, my son, daughter-in-law, and the grands will stroll through my house and pick their treasures, continuing the cycle.